Monday, December 31, 2012

Pictures of 2012


January 2012

Izzah's Engagement


February 2012

Nadia's Mini Birthday Celebration


Class Photo, Year 1, Semester 2


March 2012

Yana's Engagement


April 2012

Ica & Hazim's Wedding


Dolls' Dinner at Sakura International Buffet


May 2012

Department of Theatre - Gala Night (Crew Members)


Mom's Birthday Celebration at Seoul Garden


June 2012

NAFA Orientation Leaders Camp 2012


July 2012

Universal Studios Singapore with the Dolls


NAFA Freshmen Welcome Orientation Week 2012


August 2012

Dolls' Annual Iftar 2012 at Netty's Place


Dolls' Annual Hari Raya Celebration 2012


September 2012

Universal Studios Singapore with the NAFA Orientation Leaders


October 2012

Azieera's Engagement


Universal Studios Singapore's Horror Nights 2 with the Dolls


November 2012

Inter-PEI Workshop between NAFA, LaSalle, TMC, PSB and SIM


December 2012

Dolls' Annual Christmas Party 2012



2012 -  it has been a crazy and hectic year for me. It's an emotional roller-coaster ride for me. There has been too many ups and too many downs that I'm just emotionally tired. I'm just trying to be at a better place in my life for the sake of my own sanity. I know I will get there, it's just a matter of when.


Sunday, December 30, 2012

Fifty Two weeks later...



It was a crazy week this past week. Honestly speaking, I had the most fun this past few days compared to any of the days within this year. It was tiring fun all the way from Monday till Saturday. From preparing for the Christmas Party to the Slumber Party over at Netty's house.

On Monday evening, I went off to collect the so-called official Dolls' t-shirts which is totally super cute. After that, I met up with Syima to do some super last minute Christmas' decorations shopping since Alif at the very last minute decided that he was unable to make it at all. Note to self: Never to go out to town on the eve of Christmas. The human traffic was seriously bad. It was packed everywhere and just pissing the shit out of me. To top it off, I had to entertain Syima and help her find her Christmas gift and dresses. We literally walked from Bugis all the way to Orchard. I was like a fucking crazy bitch carrying paper bags, plastic bags and my bagpack. 


Come Christmas Day, it was super crazy good fun. We literally went all out with our Christmas Party. Fairul booked a Suite at Oasia Hotel and bought red velvet cupcakes which was super nice. Najib and Syima bought two Turkeys, a bottle of campagne and a bottle of vodka. The Turkey was really delicious and so good that I was constantly asking for more. Ayun and Khairul bought 4 Large Pizzas and a few side dishes. As usual, we will usually eat it throughout the whole night while just chilling and talking. Arini bought goodie bags for each and everyone of us which was super cute. Azman, Netty and me split the money to pay for the official Dolls' t-shirts. Abang Wan and Kak Lenny paid for the drinks which we surprisingly didn't finished it up.

We literally dressed-up as if we were getting ready to go clubbing. All of us look gorgeous in our own way, with our outfits and make-ups. We exchanged gifts with one another and hands down, Khairul's gift is by far the most epic of them all. He actually bought two hamsters along with their cage and food supplies. All of us were just speechless about it. After exchanging the gifts, we all took photos in our official Doll's t-shirt which really looks good on all of us. Most of our pictures that night were really super gorgeous and really cute.

To end the night off, we played Charades. It was the girls, Syima, Netty and Arini vs the boys, Najib, Fairul and me with Azman being the judge. We were the only ones who slept over since the rest had work the next morning. It was super competitive and a really close fight. In the end, the boys won after more than 3 hours of playing Charades. After that most of us stay up all the way until 7am just talking and catching up. Since Netty, Syima, Najib and Arini were sleeping inside the room, Fairul, Azman and me slept in the living room. It was really nice having a real heart-to-heart conversation with both of them after so long. 

It was by far the best Christmas Party I have ever had. My loved ones were there with me.


After a wonderful Christmas party, some of us went over to Netty's house for a slumber party. The first night only Netty, Syima, Khairul and me slept-over. Netty, Syima and me had a Gossip Girl marathon all the way till 5plus in the morning. The next night, I went back home while Netty, Syima, Khairul and Najib slept-over. On Friday, I came over after accompanying Nazron to town and he bought me a pair of Pedro shoes as a birthday present. Friday night over at Netty's place, we had a rematch of Charades. It was Netty, Syima, Arini and Zarrin vs Najib, Fairul, Khairul and me. For a first timer, Khairul did surprisingly well but sadly, we lost by one point. It was crazy and competitive fun. We had too many hilarious and candid moments.

The next afternoon, we cooked brunched together. Najib set the table while Netty and Khairul cook and I just help them out. Fairul and Syima as usual, still asleep. It's sort of a tradition for us to cook as a group whenever we have a sleepover and one of our houses. We cooked Creamy Mushroom Soup, Mac & Cheese, Chicken Cabonara, Honey Chicken and Yellow Rice with Half-Spring Chicken from the previous night's dinner's leftover. It was so filling and we continued with our Gossip Girl marathon. Later for dinner, we ordered Chilli's and Ayun joined us. Khairul went off for dinner with his family at Lau Pa Sat while Najib went to visit his cousin at the hospital who just gave birthed. 

Wrapping up the whole week with the Dolls' was perfect. There was excellent food and perfect company, nothing could go wrong. Surprisingly, this time round, there was no drama at all. I love my Dolls.


Monday, December 17, 2012

Fifty weeks later...

In two weeks' time, it's going to be 2013. Time really passes by so fast when you are enjoying what you are doing. I'm just super thankful for everything so far.

Anyway, I received my results last Monday. I'm thankful that I got a 3.0 GPA but I know that I could have done better. I'm just disappointed that I got a C for my Principles of Marketing. Honestly speaking, I thought I was on the right track for that module. Personally, I think I did quite well for all my tutorial assignments and for both class tests. During exam, the questions were surprisingly straightforward. I was able to elaborate on each points really quite well. I truly have no idea where did I go wrong to deserve a C for it. Too bad, things happened and I just have to suck it up and move on. No point dwelling over something that can't be undone. 

Now I just need to concentrate on the next semester. Our class schedule is out and it is quite ridiculous. I'm pretty much speechless. 

Monday -  Dance Production (12pm - 2pm), Stage Management II (4pm - 6pm)
Tuesday - Organisational Communication Skills (4pm - 6pm)
Wednesday - Concert Management (7pm - 9pm)
Thursday - Contract Law, Lecture (9am - 11am), Business Finance (6.30pm - 9.30pm)
Friday - Contract Law, Tutorial (9am - 10.30am)

I have two days where my classes end after 9pm and I have one day where I got 7 and half hours worth of break. As much as I want to complain about it, I realized that I actually can't be bothered with silly things like this. My main objective is to study, graduate with a Diploma in Merit and then continue with my Degree. It is better for me to focus all my energy onto my studies and figure out how to avoid getting any more Cs or Ds. 

On a side note, I have decided to pull out from the Students' Council between SIM Global, TMC Academy, PSB Academy, LaSalle and NAFA. I was supposed to attend the first official meeting between the representatives but since it was raining super heavily, I decided that my sleep was much more important. Well, apparently they have already voted all the members and their respective roles. Out of professionalism, they dropped me an email with the minutes of the meeting. Let's just say I have no idea what is the whole objective of the Council. All I did know was that there would be another meeting this coming Tuesday and we are supposed to do something for CNY. Truth be told, are these people really that free or do they really manage their time like super well? I don't mean to be a bitch but I could tell that I won't be able to work well with certain people. What do you expect when you throw a bunch of overachievers with huge egos from different private schools into one room? Don't be surprise if I was the first one to stab someone else in that room.


My birthday went really well. I was actually more excited about my own shopping spree more than anything else. I went and bought myself a 2013 turquoise organizer, a Marvel comic and the first 5 books of "A Song of Ice and Fire". I was majorly disappointed that I didn't get to buy the "Avengers Vs X-Men" 12-series comics because I sort of accidentally overspent on other stuffs. Overall, I was just happy that I was able to buy books after so long. 

Some of the Dolls managed to surprise me with a really super nice birthday cake. Nazron, Netty, Fairul, Syima and Najib came over to my house to surprise me. It was really super cute and super nice of them to do it. I truly am so grateful to them. The birthday cake is really the best cake that I have ever had so far. It's so perfect. It's red velvet cake covered in baby pink and baby blue mint ice-cream with m&ms, gummy bears, hot fudge and whip cream as toppings. It was super nice! I totally love it! Then after that we just chilled under the void deck until 3plus in the morning. It wasn't much but the cake and the company was perfect.

At last, I got a MacBook Pro as a birthday gift from my Dad. Ever since I started NAFA almost 1 and half years ago, he kept saying that he would buy it for me but never did. Part of me has so-called given up hoping for it. I'm super thankful that he actually got it for me and to top it off, he got me a 1TB harddrive to go along with it. I love my Dad. Now I'm updating my blog using my MacBook Pro. 

This is by far the best birthday I have ever had because of the company and the presents. Even though there was no party, the thoughts behind the surprise and the presents are more than enough and it's perfect to me in every way. Syukur-Alhamdulillah.


Sunday, October 14, 2012

Forty One weeks later...


Now where do I even begin? Let's just start with school first, shall we?

Stage Management 1
- Cue Sheets = 15th October 2012
- Cue Sheets with Blocking and Scripts = 22nd October 2012
- Prompt Book = 29th October 2012

Web-Centric Applications for Business
- Final Project = 02nd November 2012

Aesthetics of Arts (Performing Arts)
- "Brechtian Theatre" Presentation = 22nd October 2012
- "Brechtian Theatre" Report = 29th October 2012

Principles of Accounting
- Test III = 17th October 2012

Practical Scenic Design
- Final Stage/Runway Design = 01st November 2012

Introduction to Ceramics
- "Transformation" Final Project = 02nd November 2012

Semester 1 Exams (12th - 16th November 2012)
- Introduction to World Music (Theory)
- Principles of Marketing (Theory)
- Principles of Accounting (Theory)
- Practical Scenic Design (Theory/Practical)



Exams are less than a month's time and I have just started revising only my Accounting and Marketing modules. I am actually kind of nervous for my exams this time round. I'm just going to keep myself calm and manage my time properly. I am already staying back in school for the past two weeks till around 8pm.  I am just really mentally tired but I need this badly.

Last Friday, 05th October 2012, I attended the NAFA Scholarships & Awards Tea Session. It was sort of cool and fun. I was selected to mingle around with some of the sponsors. I am actually surprised that I was able to compose myself and be very professional about it. I was even able to make small meaningful talks with the sponsors. My socializing skills has definitely improved.

On a side note, from 60kg to 56.5kg. I lost 3.5kg within 3 weeks. Good for me. NAFA Beach Bash 2012 was one hell of a time. I had loads of fun. From doing registration for our department, cheering for them, helping out with OSC and our after-party drinking session. Anyway, our department, Arts Management and Education, won 2nd place for the Inter-department Telematch. We combined with Fashion Department and got 1st place for Beach Soccer. We are also part of the organizing committee. Last but not least, we got our super cute department t-shirts. 

I seriously had loads of fun during our Annual After-Party Drinking Session. This time round it was more intimate. It was only me, Nadia, Nique, Yun Hou, Lim Hui, Nicole, Pam, Yus, Amiera, Kevin, Fir, Azura, Anis and Melvin. I was pretty much drunk. I was emotional, crazy and stripping myself in the waters. It was good crazy fun. Looking forward for our 3rd and final year. It's going to be bittersweet.


So one of us is officially engaged. Part of me is still in a state of disbelief that we are all actually growing up. I am truly happy for her to find the love of her life and be so sure about it. Marriage is a huge step, just goes to show how much she has mature after all the years that I have known her. I am honestly proud of her. After so long of not having late night chilling session and doing silly stuffs together, I had a blast taking pictures with them and just relaxing. It was really nice. I love them too much at times.
 


Sunday, September 23, 2012

Thirty Eight weeks later...



Next seven weeks of school is going to be one of the craziest time I am ever going to have in NAFA so far. Here's the breakdown of my assignments, projects, reports, tests and final exams.

Web-Centric Applications for Business
- Final Project = 29th October 2012

Aesthetics of Arts (Performing Arts)
- "Brechtian Theatre" Presentation = 22nd October 2012
- "Brechtian Theatre" Report = 29th October 2012

Introduction to World Music
- "African Music" Presentation = 01st October 2012
- "African Music" Report = 01st October 2012
- Final Music Test = 29th October 2012

Principles of Marketing
- Test II = 27th September 2012

Principles of Accounting
- Test II = 26th September 2012

Practical Scenic Design
- Final Stage Design = 01st November 2012

Introduction to Ceramics
- "20X20X20" Final Project = 02nd November 2012
- "Transformation" Final Project = 02nd November 2012

Semester 1 Exams (5th - 9th November 2012)
- Principles of Marketing (Theory)
- Principles of Accounting (Theory)
- Practical Scenic Design (Theory/Practical)

I need to be on full study-whore mode. 
I need to increase my GPA. 
I need to be the top student of my department.


Nowadays, my blog is more and more about my school work rather than anything else. I have no idea why but for the first time in my life, I am very private about my relationship. I don't wish to share it. I will update my friends about it as minimal as possible. I'm just thankful with the way things are right now.


Sunday, September 09, 2012

Thirty Six Weeks later...

I have been so freaking busy that I don't even have time to update my blog. So today's entry would be two weeks' worth of drama and bullshit. With the amount of craziness going on around me, it's a miracle that I have not killed someone yet. I'm not even sure where I should begin? 


Let's start with school.

My school load is getting more and more hectic. Every week, there would either be a class test or an assignment with the deadline being the following week. It's like constantly back-to-back. Our submissions usually would include with a presentation as well. 

I had to submit two art pieces within the week and had an art debate trying to convince the class why an ugly painting is nice for Aesthetics of Arts. 

Web-centric Applications for Business is fucking ridiculous. We are supposed to create a website but strictly using CSS style sheet. The other class, being a week earlier than us, got totally ripped apart by the dickhead lecturer. Apparently, almost everybody in the class had to re-edit their work because he claims that the colour scheme was not appealing to him or that they don't know what they are doing. I swear to God that the lecturer is a fucktard with no emotions. So for the past week, I have been reaching school at 9am and stepping out from school at 11pm trying to perfect my website design. I just can't wait for this module to be over and done with.

I had my Introductions to World Music test last Monday. Pretty much going to ace it. I need to start on my presentation for the module as soon as possible, just to get it out of the way. 

I'm having Stage Management class tomorrow and we are supposed to bring a bloody toolbox to class just to show her that we understand what she is teaching. Since my dad has a toolbox, I'll just grab his but the problem is that he doesn't have a small hammer. I'm going to school tomorrow with a huge-ass hammer.

Principles of Marketing, I got nothing to say about it since I know that I'm on the right track of scoring at A for it.

Let's just say, I know how I am able to score for my Principles of Accounting. It's more of doing it rather than getting the correct final answer. I should practice what I preach, which is to never leave any questions blank. Just need a little bit more of practice.

Lastly, it's my Introductions to Ceramics. I have already gotten my final project brief and I'm supposed to create two sculptures within two weeks. One would be a 20X20X20cm while the other would be entirely up to me. I really need to start research on it soon.


That is only the stress that I have about my course, the stress that I'm getting from the drama surrounding the schoolmates. As much as I'm not directly involve but the negativity surrounding it can be fucking overwhelming at times. That would be for other time, I guess.

There's a separate topic that I would love to type down on my blog but I know better than that. Some things are left to be unwritten or unspoken.

I just felt slightly better that I'm able to update my blog. I really need to update my livejournal soon, just really need to let out all my emotions. I have been bottling up, suppressing and pushing away my emotions lately.



Monday, August 20, 2012

Thirty Three weeks later...

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri! 
Mohon Maaf Zahir dan Batin!


Well, what a crazy week I had so far. From test to assignments to birthday celebration to Hari Raya, but it was all worth it. 

I broke fast with Nisa, Fee, Haikal and Lim Hui at Zam Zam last Monday. I swear to God, I feel effing fat after that. The portions were quite big and it was so fulfilling but at least, I had a nice time with them. That's the good thing about hanging out with them. They are so focused on their studies but at the same time, they know when to relax and just enjoy life. It was nice.

What wasn't nice was my Principles of Accounting test last Wednesday. I pretty much failed it. I think the whole class pretty much screwed it up except for 4 guys. It was effing tough and so confusing. After taking the test and knowing that I would have failed, I seriously felt like breaking down and just cry. I just decided not to, I was just going to take it as a mistake and learn from it.

Anyway, I did my first Flash Mob at school. Truth be told, it was so crappy but at least we did had fun in front of the crowd. From 24 people who volunteered for it, only 10 turned up due to the rest unable to escape from class. On a side note, the Office of Student Care would be having a 3 Days/2 Nights chalet in December for the 70plus Orientation Leaders. I'm so ecstatic about it. We are still going to USS on the 15th of September but only half of us could make it. The chalet would give us time to catch up with each other since all of us are busy with test, assignments and submissions. We rarely bumped into each other at all.

We had a mini surprise celebration for Khairul since it was his 23rd birthday. We literally gave him 21 mini presents, a box of cupcakes and an Emporio Armani slippers, total of 23 presents. Personally to me, by far, it is one of the cutest and have surprise that we had done so far. Now the problem would be how am I supposed to plan this for the September babies. I'm so screwed.

Hari Raya came and it was my first time going for Solat Aidilfitri with Nazron and Khairul. It was also my first time praying outside the Mosque. I rather love to pray inside the Mosque rather than outside on the canvas. As usual, I would always have a blast with the Cuzzie Wuzzies. They are the best cousins that I could have ever asked for and my siblings, off course. It was just nice and perfect in so many ways. 

Syukur-Alhamdulillah.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Thirty weeks later...


The first week of my Year 2. I'm still in a state of disbelief that I am actually studying in NAFA and am already in my second year. I will be forever grateful for the chance given. Syukur-Alhamdulillah.

Once again, I had 7 core modules plus 1 additional extra credit module.

Web-Centric Applications in Business
HTML and Java Script. I have always hated any modules that have to do with them. Surprisingly, this time round, I'm a little bit ready for it. Most probably because I have been meddling around with the codings for my blog for the past few years. I am slightly getting the hang of it. To top it off, we will be learning Dreamweaver and Photoshop which I know the basics quite well. 
The only problem with this module would be the lecturer. He has a tendency of saying the word 'alright' and 'well' every few seconds that most of us get easily irritated by it. I'm just going to try to brush up on my zoning out skills so that I would be able to zone out those two words.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module. 

Introduction to World Music
This module was pretty much straight forward. We would be learning more about folk/traditional music with a modern twist from all around the world. We have to learn the types of musical instruments and the type of sounds they make. There's only two test and a presentation. I'm super confident for this module.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module.

Stage Management 1
Pretty much the reason why I join NAFA in the first place, to be a Stage Manager. I was honestly looking forward to this module until the lecturer starts to open her mouth. Her pronunciation was quite bad and the way she paraphrase her questions are a tad confusing. Half of the time, I'm trying to figure out what exactly is she trying to convey to us.
The upside to this module would be that it is very hands-on with loads of presentations and site visits. Even though the way she teaches us is super dry and three quarter of the class are stoning, I'm the only one who constantly pretends that I am listening. I will try my best to get on her good books.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module.

Principles of Marketing
A combined class with PA2A and VA2A. I have always hate combined classes. I couldn't concentrate that much with the amount of people in the room. Anyway, for this module, I pretty much think that I can score quite well if it is essay-based questions. By as for now, it is still to early to tell but the lecturer is a really nice guy.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module.

Principles of Accounting
Firstly, the lecturer is super fun! He makes the class interesting and very engaging which is a very good thing. On the other hand, this is my first time studying Accounting and I'm a bit scared that I won't be able to catch up. Hopefully with my studious and encouraging classmates, I'll be able to understand it soon.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module.

Aesthetics of Arts (Performing / Visual)
Apparently this module is being split into two. With the first 7 weeks, we will be learning about Visual Arts and interpreting them while the next 7 weeks, it would be Performing Arts and understanding them. Two separate lectures but at least, I had classes with them during my first year. This class is going to be quite a breeze.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module.

Practical Scenic Design
Autocad, Stage and Lighting Design. What's there not to love about this module. I have been scoring As for the foundation of the module. I pretty much have this one settled and the lecturer is super fun and understanding.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module.

Introduction to Ceramics
I took up this module as my Cross-Disciplinary Elective and furthermore, it was 3 credits. I was trying to get as much credits squeeze it.
Anyway, I found out that 5 of the Year 3 Theatre students were in the same class with me. I'm pretty much excited about it since I know the whole Theatre English Department. From the looks of it, this class is going to be so much fun because of the classmates, the lecturer and the amount of freedom that we have to allow to express ourselves.
Insya-allah, I will get A for this module.

On a side note, it's kind of nice to be so-called popular. I mean, I was popular back in Tekong but it was more for a different kind of reason. Everybody in Tekong knows that I was an outgoing and flamboyant gay boy who was my officer's PA. In NAFA, the feeling of being popular is different. People actually look up to me. They know that I'm one of the smart ones, outgoing and friendly. At the same time, they also know that they can just approach me to strike up a conversation and I would also gladly help them. 

It feels real nice to have people smiling and saying hi to you even though half the time you have no idea what's their name.


Sunday, July 22, 2012

Twenty Nine weeks later...



What can I say about this week? It is pretty much one of the most tiring week I have ever had in NAFA so far. It was physically and mentally draining for me. 

Monday
The Orientation leaders had to report at 8am for briefing and confirmation of our roles. We welcomed the freshmen from Design & Media, Dance, Music and Fine Arts. It was pretty much a first time for most of us so as expected, there was quite a number of miscommunications. Honestly saying, it wasn't that bad at all. Pretty much everybody was able to fix any issues or misunderstandings on their own.

Tuesday
We welcomed the freshmen from Arts Management & Education, Theatre, Fashion Studies and 3D Design. The energy level was quite hyped up and it was much more fun entertaining them. Since most of us already know what was needed to be done, it went much more smoothly then the first day.

Wednesday
It was a matter of welcoming the Degree Students and there were only about 100 of them. It was quite straight forward and lasted only half a day. Then after that, we had a pre-camp briefing/training which was rather interesting and honest. The committee had to finalize all last minute camp stuffs. 

Thursday / Friday
The first NAFA Freshmen Orientation Camp 2012. It was chaos and everything went haywire from the start. We were trying our best to hold everything together and making sure that we put the freshmen before ourselves first. As usual, I am always in-charge of the administrative duties while the other Co-Vice Chairman, Tristan is in-charge of all the heavy/physical duties. From a third party's point of view, the camp actually was a success but from the leaders' point of view, there are still a whole load of things which we can really improve on if we were given a longer time frame to plan on.

Personally for me, it was a success. The freshmen got to make friends with students from other departments, they bonded really well, they had loads of fun and it was a memorable experience for almost everyone there.

As much as it was very tiring for me, I had a truly wonderful time.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Moving on...



I just needed to put up a picture of the Harries twins. Jack and Finn Harries. They're British. 

Something totally unexpected happened today.

I bumped into an ex-secondary schoolmate of mine. Out of courtesy sake, I said hi. Before I knew it, he told me that he was transferred to the same department as me a few months after I have completed my NS. He was telling me that he knew everybody in the office and vice versa. 

What a small world.

So I just let him continue rattled on about all those men that were under my care during my time of service. The unexpected part was when he told me that he used to be closed to Syed Fairuz. The guy that I am so in love with up till this very day. He just blatantly said that SF is now married to the same girl that has been with him throughout NS. The girl that hated me for trying to so-called steal SF away from her. 

There and then, I could literally hear my heart turn to ashes and being blown away into the wind while my facial expression was still maintaining an interest towards the conversation. My thoughts went back to the 8 months that we spent together. 

I guess upon hearing that news, it was the closure that I needed in order to move on with me life. I've been stuck in this stupid position since 2007. I just wanted to cry my eyes out. I wanted to cry myself to sleep. Right now, I'm just trying to grasp, understand and fully digest the news. Part of me is still living in denial.

Two heartbreaks within a month. I wonder how many more heartbreaks do I need to deal with before I would finally commit suicide? I'm no longer strong as I use to be. It's beginning to hurt. The bandage is no longer doing its job.


Monday, April 30, 2012

Seventeen weeks later. ♥




It's exam week. As much as it was stressful, overall, I think I'm doing pretty fine. Honestly speaking, Syukur-Alhamdulillah I am able to absorb and learn things easily. To top it off, a lot of things happen this week which was quite exciting and entertaining. So pardon me but this blog entry is going to be a slightly long one than usual.


First paper was Arts Awareness (Dance). I am so thankful that the questions were all straightforward and rather easy. Thinking about my overall performance throughout the semester for this module, I can say that I'm quite confident to get an A for it. I submitted two dance reports, did quite good for my group presentation, my attendance was perfect and I participate in all the class activities. Insya-allah.

Second was Arts Awareness (Theatre) paper. They always say to study smart rather than study hard and I couldn't agree more. I am so thankful for everything. As much as the paper was complicated, it was surprisingly quite easy if you were to be able to understand the questions. The way that the lecturer phrases the sentences was her way of confusing us. It was honestly quite tiring to write two reports and one comparison essay within two hours. Overall performance, I think I'm might barely scrape an A for this module as well. Insya-allah.

Third was my Fundamentals of Sound Practical exam. Too much drama. It was supposed to be done in groups of 3, so I choose Lim Hui and Haikal. On the day, Lim Hui got stuck in a traffic jam and arrived 20 minutes late for a 40 minutes practical exam. Thankfully, I managed to clear my diagram within 5 minutes and both, Haikal and I managed to get the sound system correctly. Honestly speaking, I couldn't be more thankful to Mr. Colin for still giving Lim Hui a chance even though he was quite late. Lets just say that for this module, I am super confident of getting an A for it. I am actually bloody good at understanding all the fundamentals of this module. Insya-allah.

And the second last paper was the one that everybody has been dreading about, Microeconomics paper. The module that I've been studying for like a crazy psychotic freaking study-whore. As much as I scored an A for both of the term tests, the exam paper were pretty much a whole different story. I was memorizing 8 freaking chapters like a psychopath and when I received the exam paper, my mind decided to literally went blank on me. I literally couldn't think of any of the answers at all. I spent the first 15 minutes trying to relax and not psyche myself out. After what seems like an eternity, then I was finally able to string together my chain of thoughts. I was constantly writing and writing until the last hour of the three hours paper, I realized that I didn't give a single examples of any situations for my answers. I had to spend the next 35 minutes rewriting my answers until I could no longer feel my fingers. I seriously hate any 3-hours-exam-papers. Throughout it all, I am actually quite confident of my answers since all of them were straight-to-the-point and full of relevant examples. Insya-allah, I will score an A for this module as well.

And the last paper is this coming Thursday, 03rd May 2012, - Fundamentals of Lighting and Sound written exam paper. I will start studying for it starting tonight and I have 3 full days to understand and memorize everything.


Living in this world, no matter what you do, you will always have a group of spiteful haters but at the same time, you know that you will have a group of loving and concern supporters watching your back. As much as I don't show it, I love my parents and my siblings a lot. No matter what happens, I know for a fact that I have their support and they will always have mine. So off course, I will try to rescue them when one of their names got publicly smeared online. It's only right that I do it since it's flesh and blood. ♥  

Sincerely forgive me for being too dumb to understand the whole situation. I know both sides of the stories so am I not allowed to state my opinions at all? I was just having my random rants and never in a million years would I ever think that strangers would actually feel insulted by it. For the love of everything pure in this world, I don't even think that I know any of these strangers at all. It comes as a shocked to me that strangers would actually comment on my own thoughts and be so defensive and against it. Honestly speaking, we don't even know each other at all so why take offense on something that could be so random and universal? Up till now, it still confuses me as to what exactly does these strangers want from me? On the other hand, I am truly thankful that these very same strangers that got offended are the very ones that are praying for me. Weird but nice strangers still do exists in this world. Syukur-Alhamdulillah.

Never doubt my faith in Allah SWT for my faith in him is much more stronger than you will ever think. Do you honestly think that I wanted to be gay? As in, I woke up on one fine glorious morning and say, "Oh my, I feel as if I should be gay for the rest of my life?". Seriously? Are you really that moronic? If you have truly read the Quran and fully understand it, you will know what to do. No human beings have any right to judge others, only HE has the power to do that. So please don't go around trying to preach to me about being gay is a sin when you sleeps around like a prostitute, drinks like an alcoholic, take drugs like as if your life depends on it, cuss like a sailor, have piercings because you think it's cool and tattoos all over your body . At least, I have finished reading the Quran and am always trying to do my best to do my five prayers. I am not judging you, I am stating the facts and I don't really care since it is your life that you are wasting. Honestly speaking, I will never understand what exactly do you want and I have no intention in wanting to know what you want.

Pretty please before you go around dissing me off, do know that I actually find comfort, excitement and entertainment in people dissing me off publicly. My siblings, my cousins and my Dolls know that I love it when people dissed me off. Personally to me and to intelligent people around the world, it just goes to show how pathetic people are that they got nothing better to do with their life then dissing off successful people. So from the bottom of my heart, I would like to say thank you so much for hating me.


At last, after what seem like a really long time, the Dolls managed to meet up and have a wonderful catching up session with each others. It's just a pity that Alif and Fairul couldn't join us. Insya-allah, maybe next time they could. If they did come down, it would literally be full strength since last year May's chalet. Looking back at it, it has literally been more than 4 years of us knowing each other and really trying our best to be there for one another.  

It was really super nice and feels so right to be among them. Sakura International Cuisine was surprisingly quite nice, even though we had to seat at two separate table since that can't accommodate all 17 of us. Never in my mind would I expect my Dolls to grow from just 8 of us and there's 20 of us right now. Yes, we are not that close to each other due to our never ending busy work and school schedule but deep down, I know we will drop everything that we are doing if anyone of us are in trouble or needs help. ♥ 

After dinner, I really had loads of fun chilling at Nabins with them except for Q and Ayis. As much as the place was sort of cramp, it was super nice to catch-up and update each other about our own lives. And I'm beginning to think that we are going to love playing 'Murderer' since we seriously like to debate and kill each other easily. It was nice to see that everyone of us catching up with each other just like the good old times and it was cool to introduce Dzaki to all of us. Let's hope that he would understand how we work. All of our dramas, our bitching, our weirdness, our cravings and our thoughts since he might become a long-term Doll. I need him to understand us, it's no longer a want. Insya-allah.


People come and go. That is one of the main facts of life. The problem is that nobody ever told us that people come and leaves a huge impression in our lives, only to go away as if nothing ever happens. I am at the stage of life where I have had too many people coming and going into my life as and when they pleases. Now, I am totally immune to people going out of my life.

If you want to walk out of my life, just walk out. Honestly speaking, you don't have to make a big fuss about it. It makes my life much more easier since I have one less person to worry about. I am already a part-time in a number of people's lives and truth be told, I prefer it that way. It's much easier to manage and less complicated. I can never hate people. The worst that I would go is to dislike them a great deal or to pity their existence. That's all.

People change. You will always have three options to choose from. It's either you adapt to their changes or you come to a compromise or you just walk away. If you still want them in your life, then just shut up and adapt to them. If you aren't sure about wanting them in your life, talk to them about it and try your best to come up with a win-win situation for your relationship. If you can't be bothered with their changes, then just walk away quietly.

Every year without fail, I will always have either one or two person that I used to care about walking out of my life. Every year since 2005, and now I have about 11 people who had walked out of my life. Honestly speaking, I don't really mind at all. Sometimes, it's the best for all of us. I will always take it as a lesson learned and wish the best for them. I will never hold a grudge against them for walking out of my life. I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. I will never truly grasp the concept or the true reason behind what happened but I believe in HIM. That's why I don't kick a fuss about it, I just let it be.

With that said, thank you very much for the wonderful memories.

Wednesday, April 04, 2012

April's Schedule


It's going to be a jam-packed month of April.

Creative Writing Skills
- Funding Proposal Submission = 10th April

Arts Awareness (Theatre)
- Chinese/Japanese Theatre Quiz = 03rd  April
- Western Theatre Quiz = 18th April
- Written Exam = 25th April

SAS - Fashion
- MCQ Written Test = 10th April

Arts Awareness (Dance) 
- Written Exam = 23rd April

Fundamentals of Lighting and Sound
- Sound Practical Exam = 26th April
- Written Exam = 03th May

History of Pre-Modern Western Art
- Written Test = 07th April
- Artwork Submission = 13th April

Microeconomics
- MCQ Written Test = 13th April
- Written Exam = 27th April















Insya-allah, I will study hard for the exams.
Insya-allah, I will get through the exams.
Insya-allah, I will pass all the exams.
Insya-allah, I will get straight A's.

Honestly speaking, I'm sort of happy that I have a packed schedule.
It keeps me busy and forces me to constantly study.
And I was beginning to get bored because of the lack of assignments.
Syukur-alhamdulillah, I will be able to study non-stop.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Untitled...

It was weird of you to send a Facebook friend request to me considering that my display picture was rather horrendous. I looked like I got raped, drugged and just had a mug-shot. I just accepted the friend request without much thought and instantaneously received a message from you.

“Hi there, my name is Tobias. Hoping that I could get to know you more. Xxox”
And I happily replied, “Sure. Anyway my name is Fadly, thanks for adding me up. *huggies*”

You asked for my mobile number without hesitation and before I knew it, we were whatsappin’ each other, throughout my journey back home.


Upon reaching home, I logon to my Facebook account and lo and behold, you were really gorgeous. I really felt like an ugly duckling compared to you. Going through my notifications, I realized that you clicked “liked” on almost half of the pictures in my profile album, including those pictures where I seriously looked like a freak. I thought it was a joke that you liked several of my pictures. Clicking on your profile, I immediately noticed that most of your pictures were of runways and photo-shoots. I remembered you telling me that you are a student taking your degree in Fashion Studies in a school in Copenhagen, Denmark. I automatically asked if you were a model. At the back of my mind, I was really super excited to be friends with a real male model. Surprisingly, you were easily honest to me.

Over the next few months, we were skyping and whatsappin’ each other on regular basis. Throughout this whole time, not once did we ever voice out if they was something going on between the two of us. We click on so many levels and we were so comfortable with each other that our families knew about us. To top it off, every time I saw an ad with you in it, I was super proud.












Roughly five months after we know each other, you told me that you wanted to visit Singapore for a week or so. I was so excited that I was constantly smiling the whole time we were skyping. I was literally counting down the days to your arrival. I skipped school just to make sure that I could fetch you from the airport. You told me that most probably you would be coming alone; it’s just that I didn’t expect you to come down with another four more of your model friends. Much to my excitement, I know all four of them; it was Francisco Lachowsky, Sebastian Suave, Sean O’Pry and James Smith. I could literally have an orgasm when I saw you guys walked out from the arrival hall. When I walked over to say hi to you, shockingly, you guys gave me a kiss on the cheek each. I almost had an orgasm on the spot but I was able to control myself. It was a good thing that I was able to use the family car to drive you guys to the hotel. While walking to the car, you were holding on to my hand all the way. It didn't feel weird because I have been holding most of my friends’ hands for the fun of it. The issue was that it felt perfect.

After letting you and your friends checked-in first, we decided to have dinner at 8pm that night. After dinner, we were just sitting and discussing the itinerary during your stay. The weird thing was that I literally remembered what the plan was. You guys arrived on a Wednesday evening from New York Fashion Week. 


Thursday – Universal Studios Singapore, the whole day.
Friday – Shopping in the afternoon and Attica at night.
Saturday – Relaxing by the pool and dinner with the Dolls.
Sunday – Shopping and Movies during the day and drinking at Brewerkz.
Monday – Catching a tan at Sentosa and chilling at Tanjong Beach Club.
Tuesday – Trying out our luck in the Casino.
Wednesday – Last minute shopping and clubbing at Zouk.
Thursday – Your flight is at 6pm.

It was literally crazy going out with you and your model friends. People who keep up with the fashion industry would recognize all five of you guys and I was there, like a misfit. Every now and then, strangers would come up to take pictures with you guys and I would have to be the so-called photographer. As much as you felt bad for me, there’s nothing much you can do about it.  At times, we will be going to places in my car and at other times, we will be taking public transport. Every time we take the public transport, you have the tendency to put your arms around my shoulders or my waist and rest your chin on my head. I don’t even feel uncomfortable at all and it’s a bit confusing for me considering, that I don’t know what is going on. The other thing about it was that somehow I actually enjoyed your small gestures.



USS was such a blast, clubbing with you guys was crazy and several times, you literally kissed me on the lips and said you loved me. I just kissed you back, said the same thing and laughed it off. Shopping with you and the guys was a whole different story; all of you guys shopped way worse than any of my girlfriends. It was super sweet of you and your friends to constantly ask me if I wanted anything and that you guys were willing to pay for it. Hanging out with you and the rest was just different; it was more chilled without any worries.

Without failed, I had a dinner gathering on one of the nights with only a few of the dolls and the five of them. There was Nazron, Azieera, Khairul, Syima, Netty, Randy, Alif, Abang and Fairul with this tall good looking Korean guy. Thankfully everybody was able to talk and had small conversations throughout dinner. We took like loads of pictures.

On the last day, the two of us had lunch together since you insisted. We ordered lunch and while waiting for the food, you asked me to be in a relationship with you. Honestly speaking, it never did occur in my mind that both of us would be in a relationship together. You were sitting opposite me and explaining yourself and I was just lost for words. I told you that I would give the answer later.




Our friendship was more of a relationship but I guess the thought of having a long distance relationship scares me. Come to think of it, we have been in a so-called long distance relationship for the past six months through skyping and whatsappin’.  I don’t know what was wrong with me but I didn’t give you an answer until we reached the airport. While waiting for you guys to check-in, I just kept quiet until you pulled me aside and ask me again. I told you that I’m ecstatic to be in a relationship with you. Without warning, you grabbed me and we made-out in the middle of the airport. The others were just staring at us until we stop kissing before coming over to congratulate us.